Should the husband be permitted to watch when his baby is being delivered?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy' started by iamawriter, Jun 26, 2017.

  1. wallet

    wallet New Member

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    Oh no please God no...I'm kidding! The husband should be allowed to assist birth, in fact, he is a parent and it should have this right.Still, I don't think I have the power to stay near my wife when she will give birth to our second child in November!
    Anyway, this is not possible here in Romania, we are restricted to assist birth!
     
  2. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    I can see from the comments that allowing the husband in the delivery room depends on so many factors... I guess in a way it's good for the husband to be there so he can give his wife emotional support, and give him a better understanding of the suffering and difficulty a woman goes through during delivery. This is not to discourage him from thinking of having more babies, but to give him a better understanding of the situation. Men who do not witness a delivery may think giving birth is just a piece of cake.
     
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  3. naruto100

    naruto100 Active Member

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    I agree with this. It is kind of emotional support for the ladies and yes even gents can understand the pain little by this way. But I wonder if it is allow. Generally I see doctor don't allow anybody inside. May be Ladies (mother or mother in law) is allowed sometimes. I wonder why they don't allow gents. Is other pregnant ladies too inside ward or something, but I guess operation theater should be separate for the end. Not sure.
     
  4. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    In some places, husbands are actually allowed to be in the delivery room. In fact, they are even able to film the whole delivery process. Although I'm sure there will be places that don't allow such.
     
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  5. naruto100

    naruto100 Active Member

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    That's good. Here at my place I don't think they allow anyone inside that room. Except wife insist too much for the same. But that happens rarely. But yes they should allow as nothing bad in it and it will surely give some emotional motivation to lady.
     
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  6. iamawriter

    iamawriter Active Member

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    There are many men who cannot see the suffering of others least their own partners. Having said that I wonder after seeing what goes on in a maternity room they would want to have any more children.
     
  7. Risa

    Risa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    Wow! This topic is too interesting that I gone through reading the whole thread. I just want to share my opinion regarding this.
    I personally would love to have my husband by my side when I delivered, but then unfortunately, the hospital wouldn't allow to. When I delivered our first baby I felt excruciating labor pain for 12 hours and I felt so helpless! I wish he was there to comfort me.
    Another thing, having the father inside the delivery room isn't just about seeing the sufferings and pain, it is also about the overwhelming happiness of seeing your baby being born, hearing him cry for the first time, holding him and feeling that instant connection. Could you just imagine about this miracle feeling?
     
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  8. iamawriter

    iamawriter Active Member

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    I hope all husbands were brave enough to watch this rather traumatic experience, traumatic because their loved ones are in it. Having said that you are so right about the husband soaking in the joy of seeing his baby being born even before his wife would (lol)
     
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  9. Risa

    Risa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    Certainly @iamawriter! I also understand your point of view because some individuals may have developed the "fear of seeing loved ones in pain" while others may be hemophobic and can't handle the sight of blood (well, there will be a lot of blood involved in delivery). In any other way, they can always show their love and support for their wife. It may not be their presence in the delivery room, but they can have it in a lot more ways after.
     
  10. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    I would say both men and women hate seeing their loved ones suffer, so it's highly likely many men wouldn't want to be in the delivery room. But you made me laugh with your second line of comment, hahaha. Same goes for women I would say. Some women would actually curse their husbands while in pain during delivery and swore never to bear a child again, but end up having more kids hahaha,
     
  11. iamawriter

    iamawriter Active Member

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    That reminds me of the good old days when having children was a way of life. My mother had 9 and surely she too must have vowed each time she delivered never to have any more. I suppose time heals and seeing the baby grow a mother forgets what she goes through while delivering the baby.
     
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  12. jojo_1234

    jojo_1234 New Member

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    I would love to watch my wife giving birth to our child if given the chance. I know that this is possible in our country but really haven't tried. Why I want to be around? Besides infant bonding I want to see and experience how difficult it is for a mother to experience such process. I want to be beside my wife and hold her tight to simply tell her that I will always be around no matter what. I believe this can help and with the assurance that you are around to comfort and ease her will eventually make the delivery easier and less painful you also get the chance to bond with your child early.
     
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  13. SirenOnFire

    SirenOnFire New Member

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    I agree, if husbands are not in the medical field, I think watching the whole process of giving birth would be too much for them. It could also be very bloody and messy that it would be too uncomfortable for both wife and husband. I believe though that if these soon to be fathers are really adamant to be there for their wives, and these soon to be mothers are okay with that, I say why not? It would be really comforting for women that if during this whole painful process their men are with them, but I guess not everyone would feel that way.
     
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  14. iamawriter

    iamawriter Active Member

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    With more husbands like you wanting to be with the wife at the time of delivery hospitals the world over would be encouraged to permit them to get into the labour room. In India it is not heard of though.
     
  15. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    LOL... I could just imagine her mad while in pain, haha, but she had 9. Wow!

    Well, we never really forget the pain but I guess eventually, we get used to it because it's one of the sacrifices/suffering a mom has to bear. I would rather go through the birthing pains again than have an abortion.
     
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  16. Holmes22

    Holmes22 Active Member

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    Of course they should be able to, at least I think so, but whether they want to, that is a different issue. I chose to "stay north" as they say, and I think that was the right call for me.
     
  17. Storm

    Storm New Member

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    For me it was important that my husband was present in the room for the birth of our two children and i also expect him to be there for the next birth at some point in November. Despite him expressing that it is hard for him to be there as he feels helpless and unable to do anything i honestly dp not think i would of found the strength to keep going had he not been in the room with me. Him being there made me feel more comfortable and at ease as i had someone i was familiar with in the room and not just complete strangers who could change at any minute depending on the shift and times of delivery. There were two parties involved in creating this child amd i do not see why a man would shun the opportunity to see their child enter the world ot really is an amazing experience and yes i think it provides a different type of bond not only for the father and child but for the two parents it allows the man to appreiciate exactly what the woman has to go through to provide him with the blessing of a child.
     
  18. SirenOnFire

    SirenOnFire New Member

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    I would feel that way too if I were in your position. I feel like it is fair that since both man and woman together created the child, they should both be there to greet him as he is welcomed to the world. Then again, not all men are as strong-willed as your husband to be able to be there to hold your hand as you go through the painful process of childbirth. As delivery room nurse, I have witnessed many husbands preferring not to be there for their wives considering the bloody and messy stuff that happens during the procedure. It also traumatizes some seeing something as big as a child get out of their wives' sex organ. What I'm actually pointing out is that it would be awesome and proper that they be there for their wives, but if they can't take the heat inside the DR, it's better for them to just stay outside.
     
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  19. Storm

    Storm New Member

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    I agree if they cant take the heat but how would they know if they dodnt experience it at least once. I think they have to develop some sense of maturity in regards to the child leaving via the sex organs as nature intended i dont know what they would expect. Its really a difficult one that probably varies from relationship to relationship and something i feel of discussed prior to birth whether the man be there or not is something that needs to be done i couldnt imagine my husband being there and mid way telling me he couldnt take it because of the blood etc i would feel so abandonned i am truely grateful he has been with me each time even though it was difficult for him the first time he knew that i needed him and the second time opted to stay more up top (lol) what mattered most to me was just that he was there at my side. How lucky you are in your role to be there to witness so many births and have a hand in helping women deliver. Hats off to you x
     
  20. HazelDJ

    HazelDJ New Member

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    I will depend upon the situation because there are husbands that are afraid to see the blood coming out. This is a real experience that I have noticed. The husband collapsed when he saw the blood. Instead of catering the need of the mother and the baby, here comes another one who will be attended to by the medical practitioners. It is better to ask the husband if he is willing and brave enough to see the whole thing in the delivery room.
     
  21. nolimanalo20

    nolimanalo20 New Member

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    It's really heart warming whenever I see a movie or video when the husband stays beside his wife at childbirth. I love seeing their eyes the first time they see their child. I don't know if its just on the movies but here in our country, it is not allowed. I'm not sure if its part of the ethics of medical practitioners here in our country or just the hospital policy. But if i were the one to be asked, it's good to stay beside the wife at childbirth. In that way the husband is aware on how much pain the wife has to endure to give life to their child. The husband also can give support and motivation to his wife and I know it would mean a lot to the wife knowing her husband is beside her when she sees for the very first time their child. Its a milestone on their relationship especially if its a firstborn.
     
  22. sweetpot81

    sweetpot81 New Member

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    It depends to the policy of the hospital. Some doesn't allow because of the sterility of the environment. It also depend to the wife is she prefer the husband to be around, on the other hand, the husbands decision if he can handle to be around.
     
  23. El Psy Congro

    El Psy Congro New Member

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    I think its better to just follow the hospital's policy about this one. If I have a wife about to deliver our baby, I won't really mind watching my wife but if it is against the hospital's policy then I should strictly follow it. I personally think that whether the husband is there or not during the delivery, it won't really change anything. It's not like the husband could ease the pain during the delivery or the wife would notice her husband there for moral support because she is probably busy delivering the baby out from her womb.
     

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