14 Things You’ll Miss When You Become A Parent

Discussion in 'Starlight Baby Blog Posts' started by Starlight Baby, Mar 19, 2018.

  1. Starlight Baby

    Starlight Baby Member

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  2. Holmes22

    Holmes22 Active Member

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    I feel like this list really could have gone on and on but thankfully did stop. Peace and quiet would have been one on my list but good that it was on there, but of course there is so much that you gain that it makes it worth it.
     
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  3. littlewitch66

    littlewitch66 Active Member

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    Another thing I missed when I first had a baby was adult conversation. I was used to being at work and conversing with grownups. Of course I wasn't completely isolated but I spent a lot more time at home on my own with my baby and I missed my work a little.

    I soon got used to it and although I did return to work after a few months I didn't regret spending the extra time with my baby. He was worth it especially as time went on as he began to do more than crying and pooping. I could interact with him more watching his little personality develop.
     
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  4. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    Yes, totally agree with you about gaining so much despite sacrificing some things in our lives. Looking back, I think I would be very bored with life now if I didn't have a family and kids who are the ones that keep me going each day :)
     
  5. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    True - interaction with adults/friends is the first thing that goes away after you give birth because you become preoccupied with baby. Our social lives literally take a back seat for a few months for working moms, but for those who stay at home, that would be longer, haha. But I learned that we shouldn't isolate ourselves. We need friends who can help take off the stress of parenthood even for just a few hours.
     
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  6. JiLLian

    JiLLian New Member

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    This is just so true. A lot of things changed when you became a mother. You will no longer be able to go out the way you used to. If you're a mother you don't mind getting poop on your fingers, haha. I'm sure this has happened to you too. Sleep becomes a strange subject to you as well.
     
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  7. Mika

    Mika Active Member

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    I think most men would say that they never gone through many of these things but I agree with all the points mentioned in this post as I was very much part of the entire process when we were raising up our only child. Although she was not a naughty type and did not make many problems especially during the night besides she was always willing to listen to what was expected of her but a toddler is a toddler after all and what we missed most was the movies which we stopped after her birth and never went again until she was 9. We both shared our responsibility while she was growing up and my wife quit her job for few years so we did not face too many problems.
     
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  8. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    I would say going out or having a social life is the first one to go out the window when you become a parent, especially for moms. Some dads are still able to go out wth friends despite having a baby because "mom is home caring for the baby". But forgetting our social life should not be the case because moms do need to go out from time to time to unwind with friends and gain back their sanity.

    As for poop and everything unsavory, parents tend to develop a higher tolerance for such :D
     
  9. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    That's wonderful to hear, Mika. There is no better way to raising a child than parents working together and helping each other with the responsibility, which is the right way to do it.

    However, not many dads actively participate in child-rearing. But don't get me wrong, some moms also do not want to have anything to do with child-rearing and fathers are left with a child's care. There are even single dads who raise not just one, but two or three kids.
     
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  10. tyche

    tyche Active Member

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    I agree with everything on the list, that's why I think that parenting is a tall order, it would totally change your life and puts a lot more responsibilities to you. Definitely not for those who aren't fond of kids in the first place.
     
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  11. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    Oh yes, parenting is a huge responsibility. And they should be ready to have kids because they're part of it. It wouldn't be called a family if there are no kids in it. Unfortunately, some get married for the wrong reasons and end up not caring about their kids :-(
     
  12. tyche

    tyche Active Member

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    @Elsa, so I guess my brother and his wife, even if they're already married are not yet liable to be called a "family" because they don't have kids yet, and they don't seem to want to have one.
     
  13. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    Well we're used to the traditional idea of a family as husband, wife and kids, however, they do belong to a larger family with all their parents, siblings and in-laws so that is okay. They're probably still enjoying their togetherness as a couple, or perhaps they just really love each other's company? I guess not all couples want kids and that's fine by me.
     
  14. tyche

    tyche Active Member

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    @Elsa, my brother is already 40 and his wife is 30. I think at 40 and he still has no plans of having kids then I guess it's safe to say that he doesn't want them? lol. He doesn't seem to be fond of kids as well.
     
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  15. Yannie

    Yannie New Member

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    I missed everything that you've mentioned, however I got used to it. It took me a lot of patience to understand why these things had to happen. Then I realized that I am no longer on my own. I am already a mother and I have to enjoy and savor every moment with my daughter. At this stage, it's all normal and I should not be worried about myself. It's all about her this time. As she grows up, these will all be slowly over. By then, I can have all the time for myself, not now. :)
     
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  16. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    It does seem they're not planning to have kids. And if he's not fond of kids, he wouldn't be too happy if they get to have one, haha. But we'll never really know. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be :)
     
  17. Elsa

    Elsa Starlight Baby Employee Staff Member

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    Adjusting to parenthood/motherhood is not easy. It could become really stressful in the beginning, especially if we become isolated from all our friends and everything that has to do with our social life. I've been there before and it could get depressing. Eventually, we learn to cope and adjust to our new role and new buddy, our little one. All sacrifices will be worth it in the end, you'll see. And yes, once they're all grown up, you will find a lot of time again for yourself and will eventually miss what you have now :)
     
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  18. Mika

    Mika Active Member

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    @Elsa Actually it's not as difficult in our culture since we the Indians are family oriented even if we live as a nuclear family. We always get lots of support from our family and friends even if they have to sacrifice their own comfort and privacy. We stand together whenever someone is in need whether it's a sad or happy moment.
     
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  19. tyche

    tyche Active Member

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    @Elsa, Actually his gf of 6 yrs. broke up with him because he doesn't want to have kids and get married at that time. Now he's already married, but still no kids, so I guess he doesn't like children.
     

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